Stay at Home Moms VS. Working Moms...

I think I've posted about this before, but it's come again in my life...

There's this unspoken rivalry.. I swear.. I see it, I feel it, I hear it and I'm a part of it... without judgement too...

I've been on ALL sides of this coin.. I've stayed at home with 3 kids, I've worked part time with 3 kids, I've been a stay at home single mom of two and a part time stay home single mom of 2 and now NOW a full time working single mom .. still of 2...

There is NO BETTER EASIER WAY to be a mom... it's ALL hard.. ALL of it..

When I stayed at home, I was exhausted and spent and climbed on and had NO time to myself and worked my ass off... when I've worked full time, I do all of that in a shorter amount of time and then am out of my home for 7 hours and then come home to breakfast dishes and kids needing my attention and homework...

When I stayed at home.. I wasn't eating bon bons and watching tv all day and picnicking at the park and now that I work full time, I don't love my kids less, they aren't wanting for anything and NO my career is NOT coming first ...

Anyone else have these feelings as a SAHM or Working mom??? Let's talk about it.. let's not be afraid..

02
    02/18/14
    Yep!! Thats' the thing. if you're a stay at home mom and go to work, you really just swap out some struggles...

    Working is easier in the sense that you're out of the house, you see people, you talk to adults, but stay at home is easier because you're home and it's emotionally easier.. and yet.. not...

    There just is NOT better way.. Just love your kids and be there for them as much as you can.. you will have great days and crappy days on both sides of the coin...
    3
      4Rina
      I really take issue with the whole I have to stay home so I'm not "missing anything" in my son/daughter's life. I mean, do you not do laundry and dishes and pay bills and take a shower and go to the bathroom when you are home with your daughter? No woman - and I am willing to put down money on this - is paying 100% quality attention to her children when she is home with them full time. So I can't stand that narrative...Also, a lot of women with new babies don't realize that as the children grow, the nature of your work as a stay at home mom changes dramatically. If your children are at school all day long, what difference does it make if you work outside the home or not?

      Why does it have to be a "vs" in the title of this post at all? It goes back to my post earlier today - why do we care so much how other women raise their children? Personally, I think men and women should contribute more equally both at home and in the workforce (i.e., women contribute more to finances and men contribute more to childcare and homecare), but if you don't believe that, there is no skin off my back.
      0
      02/18/14
      The "vs" was not a personal narrative or attack or an intention to bring up a battle. It was a statement of what is actually happening out there in mom world. My post clearly defends all moms. The vs was a title based on MY experience of how I feel it is out there.
      And there is a clear vs going on. With moms and again.. My post clearly states that its all relative. And I believe the one woman was making a statement if why SHE wants to stay at home .. NOT an insinuation that working moms are less involved or don't care if they miss a moment.
      The post was going fine with support and encouragement. There was NO attacking. Nobody bashing. Just exchanging words and ideas.
      0
      About Jessica
      Born: Novato, California
      Current: Sherman Oaks, California
      Birth: May 28
      On Moms.com since: Aug 5, 2013
      We live in Los Angeles, CA. I'm a writer, comedian, actor and single mom of two. Parenting is hard. I try to keep a sense of humor about it all and find the find the funny... in what is most likely NOT funny (i.e. boogers, meltdowns, homework, etc.).