Finally Admitting it to Myself
This is really hard. I have had a life-long history of abuse in my life; largely emotional and mental. I recognized that I struggled with depression when I was 15; and since then, I have somewhat tried to get help. But, while I have admitted that I have a lot of issues and that I need to fix them and that I need to see a counselor, I have never really admitted to myself that I cannot do this alone. I have never "publicly" come out and asked for help or admitted that I was helpless. I was so blessed to find a man who has loved me unconditionally from day one and given me complete support and love and acceptance, and I was so blessed almost a year ago to have the most amazing daughter I could have ever asked for. And while I have known I have problems, I always thought that I could manage. But as I have been fiercely struggling with this in my life, I have finally gotten to the point of surrender and pride destroying moment of realizing that I cannot do this alone anymore. I need help.
So no matter how hard it is, or what presumptions I have that I need to let go of, I'm asking for help. I have depression and I cannot do this alone.
Congratulations! It's time now to get better. If you've gotten this far on your own think how much better you can be with help. Our job in this life as people and mothers is to be the best we can and a lot of us need help to do it.
No shame. In fact I admirer you more for getting help rather than being stubborn and trying to do it alone.
I hope that you find the best way and I have a feeling that life will be so much better now. Congrats!!