How do YOU explain gays and lesbians to kids?

I think how to explain homosexuality to kids really depends on age. I wouldn't explain it unless they asked til probably about 10, just so I could (hopefully) nix the possibility of judgment and bias before other kids get to their ears.

I think for a little kid it would be just as simple as saying “Some women and some men love each other thy same way mommy and daddy do, and that's okay.”

I'm not straight, so this is definitely something close to my heart. I want to make sure my kids grow up in an environment where they feel accepted and are open-minded toward other people's views. I want to make sure they understand gay straight, bi, trans, asexual, or polka dot, it doesn't matter. (And honestly, I'll try to teach them about the Kinsey scale http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale as soon as they start inquiring about such things because I think that's a FAR, far better representation of sexuality than this continuously dividing line. And, aside from reproduction, I don't believe in the gender binary and don't think children should have to grow up thinking that way. We are who we are.)

Anyway.

As they get older, I would probably try to explain these sorts of things to them also, that gay and straight aren't a dichotomy in the real world and many of us are a mix of both, even if only slightly. I want to teach them that whatever parts you have, some people feel like the other gender some, might have qualities of that gender, and that it's probably due to hormonal washes. I want them to know to respect people as the gender they themselves feel they are and not use their body as a sole reference point.

(Neat fact, maybe myth... I heard Australia allows you to put whatever gender you identify as on your license and you can use whichever bathroom you choose. I think we should do away with the gender division or at least take steps towards that. How about a womens, mens, -for comfort and 'normalcy' sake, and an anybody bathroom. We're getting there. :) )

It's normal and acceptable to be or become anyone you want to be and it's good to love the people around you for who you are.

In case one of my kids is gay, I want them to be able to come to me and feel comfortable and like they won't be judged.

As for the specifics of homosexuality, I would probably go so far as to say its as varied sexually as it is between any heterosexual couples. Everyone like's different stuff. Then, I would point them to a book or Google if they are old enough to do so. My kids won't go to public school, but I wish schools taught more about gay sex and safety, at least a little, than sticking strictly to straight stuff. I get it, the controversy, whatever... But if they're going to teach protection, there should be talk of dental dams, etc... Gay kids need info too.

This is getting controversial and rambly so I'll leave it at that... But, I'd love to know what you have to add!

How do you explain gays and lesbians to your kids?

Oh, and if you check out the Kinsey scale and feel comfortable sharing, I'd love to know your number!! The chart that explains your number is just a bit down the Wiki page. :)

02
Moms Expertise
    I would tell Nina or whatever future kids I have that everyone is different. Some men love other men, or some women love other women, the same way that me and her daddy love each other. That some people love men and women. I would let them know that it's ok to like whatever you like, and that it doesn't matter if somebody likes/loves somebody else of the same gender or different gender, we're all people, and we all live here together, so it's best that we all get along and not judge one another.
    1
      04/13/14
      5Mary Hunt
      Personally, I am against that lifestyle, but as a Christian (not a religious nut) I can love the person and not the sin (as my beliefs say). With that said, I do have friends who are gay/lesbian and I recently had the following discussion with my daughter about one of my friends:
      her: why don't you like Jeremy?
      me: I do, he's my friend
      her: no, why don't you like him like him
      me:Oh! well for one Im married and for two, he doesn't like girls
      her: what do you mean?
      me: he likes boys like you like boys
      her: but doesn't he have a girlfriend?
      me: nope! he has a boyfriend
      her: o.O

      (later)
      her: mommy? does God love Jeremy?
      me: yes he does, why do you ask
      her: because I don't think God would love him for having a bf
      me: well, God loves Jeremy and his bf, he just doesn't love that they are together like that
      her: so it's ok for me to like Jeremy as a friend
      me: yes
      her: but not his bf
      me: you can like him as a friend too
      her: but what if they kiss and I see it
      me: pretend that you don't
      her: ok. *pause* you know, Jeremy is really funny!
      me: lol. yeah, I know
      3
        04/13/14
        I have always tried to be very open minded and to not judge anyone. My best friend in high school was gay. I knew it. No one else did. I currently work with a lesbian doctor and she is a hoot. We have many gay and lesbian patients where I work also. I am a firm believer that one is born with these personality traits just as straight people are. I do not believe it is a choice, as no one would choose to be judged, shunned, and basically denied to live as they wish (according to the reactions of some) .
        I once watched a movie about a young boy that was gay, (true story I might add). He came out to his mother who in return instead of being loving and accepting, banned the boy from her life. The boy was severely depressed after this and felt he had no where to turn. He eventually jumped off a bridge and killed himself. He left a message for his mother telling her how she had made him feel. The mother ended up from there to be an advocate, public speaker, and write books on the subject.
        I don't believe we as humans have the right to judge anyone. We do however have the right to disagree with the lifestyle. You can still love and accept someone without agreeing with them. I hope although I will not be having any other children, that my daughter and my grandchildren (hopefully) , will never have to worry about coming to me and discussing anything. I love unconditionally.
        1
        04/14/14
        It's a good thing 'cause there ain't no taking it back now. :P And I agree. I don't think it's a choice. It might be a choice to *act* on those feelings, but feeling them isn't a choice. I didn't wake up one day and go "Oh... Today I choose to like chicks. I enjoy the discomfort of my peers in the locker room. I would like to be treated as if I have a disease." Luckily, we had lots of not-so-straight people at my high school, so it wasn't as big of a deal as it is some places. And, of course, it's easier being a female. I heard horror stories from/about some of the guys.

        I'm lucky to have such an accepting mother... Some of my friends didn't have it so great. One of my very close friends back home told his dad who acted extremely disappointed, yelled, and abused him for it. I was outraged.

        To be honest, I don't even remember how I told you, so it must have gone smoothly I guess? Did I even outrightly tell you or did you infer?

        The only thing I remember is you thought my first girlfriend was a drug dealer and I thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world, lol. Maybe that's mean, but I was a kid, lol.
        1
        About Cassaundra Owens
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