I've mentioned it before, but I don't get along with my Dad. He's the party-er, alcoholic, druggie father who took us to parties that kids should not have been at, and left us to be watched by his drunk friends while he drank and drank and drank. I had successfully cut him out of my life, to my husband's irritation (his dad died when he was four, and he hates that I refuse to try to repair my relationship with my own dad), and I was completely fine with it. The last time I actually talked to my dad was at our wedding, and he left immediately after the I Do's because being there with my mom and step-dad made him uncomfortable. I was fine with that, too. I had invited him purely out of common courtesy.

When Nina was born, I extended a tiny olive branch, at my husband's insistence. I asked if he would like to meet his first grandchild. He said yes. However, during the visit, he got mad that I wouldn't just let her crawl around (she couldn't even crawl yet, much less sit up on her own) on his dusty, dirty, grimy, dog-hair covered, un-swept/vacuumed floor (seriously, it looks like it hasn't been cleaned since the day he moved in 22 years ago!), while his dogs who aren't great with children at all (I've seen two of them bite a kid before, who wasn't provoking or even looking at them) ran around barking the entire time. After that, his dad came over, who I don't mind as much but am still not close to. We talked for a little bit, while dad fell asleep for the rest of the visit. The entire experience was so unpleasant that I've decided to leave it off at that. My husband has decided to keep his mouth shut on the matter, these days, because we have yet to have any actual fights, and we know that if he keeps pushing it about my dad, we will, and he still will not win (smart man).

Point being:
I got a text the other day from my dad. He had sent Nina a birthday/easter present, in the form of a giant pink bunny. I told him thank you, that it was cute, and the thought of him walking through a store carrying a giant pink bunny was hilarious. He is not that kind of guy. My husband gave me that look, saying without saying that he still thinks I should try to fix things. I still refuse. I don't mind that Nina won't get to know that particular grandpa as she grows up. My step dad is a good man, and will be a much better person to have in her life as grandpa, than my own dad.

Rant over! Sorries!

    That's a tough situation but it sounds like you're doing the right thing. As sad as it is, sometimes we have to separate ourselves from our parents in order to have a healthy life. Some people won't get that, but it's because they've never been in that situation. It's good that you've left the door open a little bit so if he does decide to make an effort there's an opportunity. It sounds like you know what your doing and your husband needs to understand that.
    He does understand, but I understand his feelings behind wanting us to get along, too. On all accounts, his dad was a great guy, but died of cancer at 30, leaving behind Trevor, his sister and his mom. So I get it, I do, and he knows I don't like my dad, but I know he also wishes he could have had time to know his dad and so he kinda resents that I did get to know my own, and in such a bad way. My dad does have our address and numbers, I guess I did give him a doggie door lol, just in case.
    About Morgan
    Current: Norfolk, Virginia
    Birth: July 17
    On since: Apr 1, 2014
    I'm a SAHM and a Navy Wife. My little family is my life, and I enjoy reading and online gaming. I like to help out where I can, and I just want to live life happily.