Getting pregnant immediately after miscarriage or waiting

I think whether or not to wait to try again after a miscarriage is a very personal question that only you and your spouse can decide.

Obviously, with miscarriages that occur much later in pregnancy, there may be physical restrictions on sex to avoid infections and, obviously, the heart break.

I know some people fall into the school of that if you have a miscarriage, no matter how early, that you should wait at least a month or two before trying again because your hormones are all out of whack. I used to fall into this same category.

However, if the miscarriage is early enough, according to my obstetrician whose knowledge base I trust very much, there's no physical reason to wait. He told me after my miscarriage that as soon as my husband and I felt up to it to start trying again. He said it may actually be better to start sooner than later because , unless you have an underlying issue (autoimmune, progesterone deficiency, blood problems, etc) that a baby conceived directly after miscarriage is likely to be MORE viable than a baby conceived several cycles later. He said it was newer research and I don't yet know his source, but I trust him with some skepticism.

But, of course, you need to be EMOTIONALLY ready to conceive again. I know that since having miscarriages, the beginning stages of pregnancy put me on pins and needles. And let me say, that's very, very hard when you're still grieving - at least for me.
When I had the aforementioned miscarriage where the obstetrician gave me the "go ahead," my husband and I did not prevent.

We didn't prevent for years before that first miscarriage and only conceived with fertility supplements so I figured there was little chance I would get pregnant.

Lo and behold, I did. I did not have a period between my miscarriage and conceiving again. I miscarried that baby also... And let me say that was a roller coaster. Ecstatic, loss, ecstatic and hesitant, loss... Back to back loss was really heart wrenching. It still is somedays.

On a sort of tangent, I just want to rant a second... I was supposed to have that first baby this week... And instead carried all my baby stuff to the curb this evening since we are moving. It hurt and I kinda want to cry just typing this. All the other stress, plus that, plus I have been asked like 10 times in the past few days when we are having kids... It hurts. It just hurts.

Pull up my Big girl panties time...

Anyway, I guess what I am saying is that from what knowledge I have... It is safe to go ahead if you had the miscarriage pretty early and might even boost your chances... But make sure you're in a state of mind to handle it and even enjoy your pregnancy first. Stress seems to make it harder to conceive anyway, so don't feel like you need to push on because "science says so" if your heart's still hurting.

What are your thoughts, ladies? Wait or go ahead after a miscarriage? What'd your OB tell you if you've been through this?

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Moms Expertise
    04/24/14
    I am very sorry Cassaundra. I know how hard it was for you. I hate you had to take the baby items to the curb too, that is like reliving the loss all over again.
    I have mixed feelings about trying immediately after a miscarriage. I too had back to back shocks of loss, and for me, that was almost more than I could bare. Emotions are still raging from the hormones anyway, and adding the up and downs of miscarriage back to back just seems like a lot of stress to put on oneself. It is a personal decision though.
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    About Cassaundra Owens
    Birth: February 13
    On Moms.com since: Oct 11, 2013
    I'm a little strange, pretty green, and learning to live life as a wife, future mother, and entrepreneur. Right now, my husband and I are trying for our first after 3.5 years of infertility and 2 losses. Viva la adventure! Join me too at MortalMommy.com!