Thoughts & fears of planning & pregnancy

I really hope I can start trying to get pregnant next year after my boyfriend moves here. But, I think the scariest thing for me will be making sure the baby will be healthy since my daughter was born with so many health problems. DiGeorge Syndrome, Tet of fallot, pulmonary atresia, asthma.. (Heart, lungs, muscles, ect). First open heart surgey at 6 months old.. second at 9 months. :/ It was just a horrible thing to go through. Very scary!
The doctor did 4 ultrasounds when I was pregnant too. They still didn't see the missing heart valve! (ugh)

I guess that's why I always kept myself distant from serious relationships and didn't think about having any other kids until now.. I was always so worried about her. Now, I think she is doing so great it's a good time to start planning before I get too old. Ahem. hehe

Anyone else had any problems with a pregnancy?

What are some of your fears..

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Moms Expertise
    11/06/13
    8Theresa Gould
    Sorry to hear you had such health issues with your daughter, but glad to hear she is doing so well now! You know that just because one child is born with problems doesn't necessarily mean any future children will. I understand it's a normal fear because after my miscarriages, I worried I'd lose the next child.
    2
      Amanda Hurley
      One of my biggest fears was having a child with DiGeorge. When my husband and I first got married, we were told that because he had it there was a 50% chance that our child would have it. We had two healthy children together, and then we got pregnant again, and it appears he has it (my oldest is from another relationship). Unless there is a parent with the syndrome, I was told the likelyhood of a child with it is 1 in 10000 (or somewhere in there). I am glad to know that she is doing well, as it gives me hope. When we found out about our baby, I didn't know where to turn. Shortly thereafter, I found this site. I am thankful for the support I have received on here.
      2
        That sounds terrifying and I'm very sorry to hear you had to go through it.

        I recently had a miscarriage after 3.5 years of trying to conceive and have been a little squeamish about trying again, so we're not actively trying just not preventing for now.

        I hope all goes well with this next pregnancy, because there all different as I'm sure you know. Keep your chin up and don't let your fears get in your way. Experience them, then kick them to the curb. I've always found fear to be something to be overcome.

        Sorry if that sounds harsh.

        I really do understand to some VERY small degree, as I've never had such complex complications.

        My fears are going through another miscarriage, having an unhealthy baby, SIDS, just about everything. I just keep telling myself it will be worth it. It will ALWAYS be worth it and things work themselves out, one way or another.
        1
          03/05/14
          Comment deleted
          11/08/13
          I'm sure it wasn't your fault, Lisa. I am somewhat ignorant in this area, so please forgive me if I come off as insensitive or rude, because it isn't my intention. I have heard that folic acid can be a big helper in preventing neural tube defects. Is your doctor (or yourself) going to super-dose you when you start trying to conceive again?
          0
            Thanks ladies. You're all encouraging. And no Cassaundra not harsh. It's true. I wouldn't let my fears hold me back from having another child one day. I want it too much. And I am glad you wouldn't either. I am sorry for your loss. I will pray next time you get preggo that it's a healthy one.

            I really want to experience things other moms with healthy babies do.. Like breastfeeding or feeding from the bottle and not having to feel my baby through a tube in her nose then tummy. Or worrying her heart is going to give up and she will just stop breathing. I was told over and over to prepare myself because my daughter wasn't going to make it. Almost daily for awhile. She had her last rights read to her quite a few times. It was terrifying. I don't regret a moment with my daughter. Don't get me wrong. It was an experience I will always remember. She is and always will be my hero. She is very brave and just a wonderful girl. I just really want to experience a healthy child. I think it'd be so fun! No meds or surgeries or heart monitors. Just enjoying that will be bliss.
            2
            11/08/13
            I completely agree with you and want this myself of course too. You are very strong for having gone through this. Best of luck and prayers for future babies to you as well.
            1
              11/08/13
              ((hugs)) Thanks
              0
              About Val Paille
              Current: Laguna Niguel, California
              Birth: July 19
              On Moms.com since: Nov 3, 2013
              Boston/Cali. Army Family. Christian, Mom to a beautiful daughter who is 18. Married to my best friend. Known him since I was 14. EDD: 7/11/16 ♡