Wow this is harder than i thought

So about 2months ago my husband asked me if he could go to florida for his best friend who is graduating college. His friend got his doctoarte degree and will now be a pharamasist. Now i told him to go cuz this is a big opertunity for him and his friend. And knowing my husband doesnt help much with the boys and works all day minus two day and comes home and plays computer games, which leaves me to do everything so i figured not a big deal. I knew i would miss him but didnt know how bad. Out of the 5years we have been married we never were seperated other than his job for 8hrs. But i stayed strong to help him through it as he has anxitey issues and was already struggling and having second thoughts about it. But i helped him and stayed strong.

Well this morning at 4:50am he woke up and got ready. He said good bye and we hugged. As soon as we hugged it hit me but i didnt show emoiton. I tried to go back to sleep but i couldnt. I all of a sudden felt sick to my stomach. Then vince woke up and was crying. I picked him up and brought him into my room and held him and cried. I then fed him and cuddled with him and felt a little better but i thought ok shower. I showerd and i felt little better. But i then just cant stop missing him. So i sent him a message and said i missed him and it was harder than i thought and i am not ready for this. He said it would be ok and he said he will be home in 4days. I want him to come home cuz i am not strong enough. Now i know what military families go through and semi truck famlies go through and i have now a bigger respect for these families.
But i am in pain, and trying to suck it up for my kids as i dont want them to see me in pain and crying cuz i miss their dad.
But it just goes to show how
Much i do love him, just find it annoying he doesnt help me more.
How can i get past this next 4 days? I know i am planning big welcome home for him on thursday with the kids which i will buy white shirts and have it say welcome home daddy, we missed u, and buy poster board and have the boys do hand or feet prints that say welcome home daddy, plus have them all give daddy something. But until then i am hurting worse than i thought i would.

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Ashley
    05/04/14
    My best advice is to keep yourself busy. When I was married my then husband was in the Army, stationed in Korea for a year. It was hard, oh man it was hard. I just did everything I could to stay as busy as I could.

    Do yu have any crafts you want to work on? A house project that can keep you busy? How about taking the kids to the park and doing a picnic?

    The worst thing you can do is sit around and think about it too much. You'll increase your anxiety and misery which will only make you miserable.

    BIG HUGS!
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    05/04/14
    Ashley
    I do plan on going shopping, taking kids to the zoo, and having dinner cuz i dont feel like cooking. But i am still so sad
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    05/04/14
    Ashley
    But what i dont get is he is not a lot of help when he is home and i do it a on my own and have to practicully bef him to help. And he is always absent minded at home even though he physically is home. Thats why i figured it wont be hard or this hard.
    So why is it i feel so empty without him right now
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    05/04/14
    Ashley
    I suppose. I guess i didnt realize how much i actually do love him until he was gone.
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      05/04/14
      Comment deleted
      05/04/14
      Ashley
      Thanks ladies but i am really struggling. I look at the kids and i cry, i see a sweatshirt of his and i cry, even his shampoo makes me cry.
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      About Ashley
      Birth: March 23
      On Moms.com since: Mar 6, 2014
      I am 25year old stay at home mom of 3boys. I am also married.