What to do if you resent your child
I think that sometimes mom's feel like they've failed if they don't feel this immediate beautiful amazing bond with their child. I personally thought that Charlie would be born, he would latch on, and we would be on our way to this beautiful perfect situation.... eh ahem.
It's normal to not feel that way. It's so perfectly normal to feel like you're doing every single thing wrong. That you're this weird emotional mess. That every other mom seems to have it down and you don't. I have the easiest baby in the world and I feel like this A LOT. We can tell ourselves for so long that we're ready. We did the reading, we talked to our friends, we read the blogs, we bought the books, we tested the gear, we read the reviews. We disinfected EVERYTHING.....
But the baby is still crying. You still haven't taken a shower. And everyone seems to be looking at you funny. And why doesn't this kid understand what I'm saying?
The good news is you're not alone. I'm positive that you feel that you are, but you aren't. And it can be embarrassing to admit this to your friends, your family, your doctor. But trust me when I say that is your salvation. Talk to people who will understand and will be supportive. Join a mommy group. Watch other mothers struggle with the same things and you'll realize just how in this together we all really are.
And I had to laugh at the "he would latch and all would be perfect" part because I had the WORST time getting Mini to latch when she was a newborn. I remember thinking what the heck is wrong with me that I can't even feed her? Turns out I needed nipple shields. Who knew?
WHAT? THEY'RE DIFFERENT? lol yes.. very. Once we found the right bottle, Charlie started gaining weight like he was supposed to and I didn't feel like worst mother of the year... who knew is right!