Dealing with dads girlfriend.

By the age of 17 I had 2 kids my own apartment , a job and married. My daughters father after being married for 2 weeks decided that he wasn't ready to be a parent. So I was raising 2 kids on my own. I finished high school and went to work it was tough but that's just part of being a parent. The father has been in and out of my daughters life and for the past year has been doing better. The problem is his girlfriend. He is court ordered to give me an address and phone number to the place my daughter will be. His girlfriend has in her mind that I still want to be the my daughters father and thinks that I should have to tell her everything that goes on with my child and she will let him know. I have her cell number and no number for him. And the girlfriend is almost never at home when my daughter is with her dad. So when I call no one ever picks up and she might send me a text back after several hours. What should I do about this?? and has anyone else had to deal with a jealous girlfriend?? I do however plan on calling the court and asking them about the number issue.

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4Halley StickleyHarrisonburg, Virginia
    05/06/14
    You have a court order so she cannot be doing anything to interfere with what the court has in place. If you feel like she is getting in the way of your child's father fulfilling his court order then you need to say something. Fact is she doesn't have a dog in the race, she has nothing to do with your children and you have to communicate with their father and she needs to get over it. I would try and have a chat with your children's father and say look she needs to respect we have children together, we have court mandates we have to follow and that is that.
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    05/06/14
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    05/06/14
    4Halley Stickley
    Thanks ladies! I have tried to do this with him but she has to be sitting right beside him putting in her 2 cents so it's hard to have a real conversation with him about our child. I plan on making a call to the courts today and hopefully that will get her to step down.
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      05/06/14
      4Halley Stickley
      You are so right Leah! And I have tried over and over to be level headed and talk about this like adults. But she just seems to think that her child they have together is more important. And I have told her no child is more important than the next they should all be treated equally and you shouldn't make a child feel unwanted and she has done that with my child!
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        05/06/14
        As the person in the same situation as the girlfriend I can tell you from my experience that I would never do that. Me and my husband have been together for 3 years and I have never met his sons mom or spoken to her and honestly have no desire too. It is not my place to interfer. I would definitely call the court. I think the only thing you can do though is file a contempt of court charge and take him to court for not following the order. You may even consider taking him to court to change your order that specifies that only you and him are to be involved in anything to do with your children since they are not married. Child custody orders are a bit like pre-nups, you can pretty much request whatever you want for it. You might not get it but it is worth trying.
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        05/06/14
        4Halley Stickley
        Amy I would totally love you if you were her fathers girlfriend! But seriously my oldest has a different father and has absolutely no relationship with her father and she doesn't seem to mind because my fiance stepped in and filled that space for her. However I have a great relationship with her biological fathers ex wife! And my daughter goes and stays the weekends with her sometimes so she can see her brothers!
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        05/06/14
        Lol I wish my husbands ex felt the same. It is such a hard situation to be in. On pretty much everyone. I wish they had better ways to deal with these things in the court system.
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        05/06/14
        4Halley Stickley
        I agree! I haven't personally been in a relationship with someone who already had children from a previous relationship but with all the things I have dealt with in my situation I just couldn't see myself being like that. Plus I have seen what it has done to my daughter and it's not her fault that her father and I are no longer together she shouldn't have to suffer. And neither any other child.
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        05/06/14
        I totally agree! I get mail with death wishes from his ex, calls me all kinds of horrible names. It is the hardest thing in the world to keep my mouth shut. Lol but in the en it is all about our kids and that is the way it has to be. But if they had places to take the kids to do drop off and pick up, that the other parent had to take the child to so many times a week for phone calls, a go between for the parents that contacted each parent on behalf of the other one it would be so much better. I mean there are good reasons why most people are no longer together. Chances are they didn't get along very well. That can't be expected to change just because they have a child together. In a perfect world that would be true...but it's so far from perfect.
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          05/06/14
          4Halley Stickley
          Thanks so much for all your advice! I just got off the phone with the court and I have to go in there tomorrow to talk to someone about it! Thanks again!
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          About Halley Stickley
          Born: Harrisonburg, Virginia
          Current: Harrisonburg, Virginia
          Birth: December 05
          On Moms.com since: Apr 22, 2014
          I am a stay at home mom of 4 wonderful children. I have just recently became and independent consultant for Cookie Lee Jewelry. I'm excited to be taking this next step in my life! my website http://www.cookielee.biz/halleystickley I'm also on Facebook!