Manly Men

So I have to admit that my husband is not your typical Manly Man. He's not super handy, isn't super athletic, likes to look nice, isn't afraid to emotional has never been hunting, never been in a fight, etc.

The good part of that is he can be really supportive of me. He's not shy about talking about 'girly' things when I need to. It's nice to have that around all the time?

On the other side sometimes I wish I had more of a traditional manly figure around the house. It would kill him to know that I feel this way, but I just want him to be a little more authoritative, you know? I don't need him to be all macho, cave man or anything. I just want him to get a little protective, show some back bone, solve problems instead of whining about them, get dirty, take initiative, not worry so much.

I'm probably just sensitive to it because our relationship has changed so much since Avery was born, but I need a little bit more man in my man. I don't think I can tell him this though. It'll hurt his feelings...

Is your guy a manly man? If not, does it bug you sometimes?

02
    05/15/14
    Beth
    Taylor, I kid you not... minus the "afraid to be emotional" part, I could have written this post. My hubby hides all of his feelings - or at least he thinks he does, I ALWAYS know when something is wrong - and it makes me insane!!! I have told him multiple times that I just want him to be passionate about something, ANYTHING!!! I am super passionate about a few things with our kids and I get downright angry with him when he doesn't do them properly and I'm not sure I've ever once seen him angry with me because I'm not sharing his passion for something.
    0
      05/15/14
      Hi Taylor,
      First off, I completely understand where you are coming from. I've dated a few guys that fit that category...but married someone totally different.

      You can hint to your husband a little instead of telling him "like it is". Maybe say things around him like "I love when you are around. You give me a great sense of security." That always makes my husband jump to defense mode because he now realizes that he is the first line of defense for the family. Also, I am sort of a tom-boyish mom (prior military, its just in my blood). I like to look under the hood of cars, work on assembling furniture, etc. Maybe challenge him to something like this. Suggest that if he can't handle fixing something around the house then you'll find someone else to do the work. Most men are territorial and tend to not like another man coming in and doing something he could very well do. Or say something such as, "if I can do this, I KNOW you can." You pretty much have to reveal his role to him. It takes some time and very careful choice of words :) but I think he'll come around. Challenge him without insulting him.
      1
        05/15/14
        8Theresa Gould
        My husband is a manly guy but not overly so. He doesn't assert himself or his manhood over me as a woman. He's become more handy over the years and he loves sports. The only time it's bugged me that he hasn't been more assertive is when I felt he should have stuck up for me/us/our children with is mom.
        1
        About Taylor
        Current: Chanhassen, Minnesota
        Birth: July 26
        On Moms.com since: Dec 18, 2013
        I'm the proud mama of my daughter Avery, born on June 6, 2013. I'm 26 years old, I work from home as a graphic designer, I will be testing for my 5th degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do in 2015. My husband, Derek, and I have been happily married for 3 years.