Hardest things....

The hardest things to me about being a mom is second guessing yourself. I've learned in 7 years of parent hood. That your first instinct regarding your child is usually the right one. After learning that...i try not to second guess myself. It happens sometimes still and i worry but for the most part I've settled in quite nicely. Another hard thing for me is not comparing her to how her bio mother was as a child (bio mom was a horrible child btw) Symoni luckily acts more like me than like her bio mom...thank goodness....and the only time i really worry about it is if she does something out of character. Which has happened about 3 times her whole life. I'm really banking on Nurture over nature and teaching her to be a good person and to make good choices will win out over her bio mom's DNA. I get compliments on her quite often...but sometimes when she's at school its like...she doesnt care for authority at school...and she walks around with a "Your not my mama i dont have to listen to you" stance and it frustrates me to know end and is starting to effect her grades because the teacher cant physically force her to do anything...i wouldnt approve of it either....but unless i threaten to take away something she loves absolutely...she wont comply with teacher's at all. This is the hardest thing for me because i worry that this flouting of authority is going to lead her down more bad roads than she can handle. I can't do anything about it other than follow her to school and give her the "mom" look all day long. Lmao....Its the end of the year and she's finally doing as she's told and finishing school with A's and B's but....what about next year?

03
Moms Expertise
    05/19/14
    Hm. I'm not sure how I'd counteract the sass. When I was young, I didn't sass at all. I'm pretty non-confrontational even as an adult, and I just didn't. My younger brother is exactly the opposite, and I remember my dad having to physically assert dominance by holding him in place for time-out--never violently, but safely, because my brother sometimes got that out of control, thinking he knew better and nobody could tell him differently. He's 22, and still kind of that way, but he's a good guy.

    As I watch my daughter grow, she's still very young, but she sometimes reminds me of my brother, and I think, "Uh-oh."
    1
      05/19/14
      8Theresa Gould
      You are a good mother or you wouldn't be worrying! :) Isn't worry our badge of honor or something?

      I'm sure you have talked to her, but at this age I'm not sure how much they "get" about how this or that will affect their future. I think if things are said in a way that your choices have consequences. So if you do X, then Y will happen, etc. sinks in better, not necessarily faster because some children seem to have to learn the hard way and unfortunately we can do nothing to fix that. I have an eight year old daughter and she's smack in between four boys....oy! She's a sweet girly-girl and then she's all tomboy sometimes! lol! For the most part she does seem to listen to our authority but there are times she asserts herself, which I think is normal, but she has to be reminded to do it respectfully when voicing her opinion. Anyways, I feel like I"m all over the place, just know I empathize with you!
      0
      About Emerald
      Birth: December 31
      On Moms.com since: May 8, 2014
      Hello, I'm Emerald, and i have a 7yearold daughter Symoni. (sa mah knee) I am a single parent and we are a bit unconventional because she isn't my biological daughter. I have no biological children thus far but one day hopefully.