Frustrated (This is a long one, but I'm ready to give up)
I don’t know where to begin or where to start… I’m so frustrated!!! I have talked, I have gotten mad, I have yelled, I have walked away, I have even gone out side and drank a glass of “RELAX” wine. Nothing seems to be helping!
My husband works and I stay home with our son. I work for a construction company 2 days a week but I can bring my son with me. (Which is AWESOME) my problem is that I do ALL the cooking, cleaning, laundry, yard work, and everything to take care of our son. My husband works M-F so he pays the majority of the bills. I buy groceries and all the food, formula, and clothes and anything else he may need. My husband has paid all the hospital bills with his flex account from work. SO my problem is since my husband works all day he doesn’t thing he needs to do anything around the house. NOTHING!!!!! I have to ask him the empty the dishwasher, and do you think he can put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher with out being asked? NO! OF COURSE NOT!!! I have to ask him to do any thing around the house. Also tonight he was feeding our son pizza!!! He is only 4 months old and yes we have to okay from the DR to give him BABY food. Not pizza!!! I have asked, told, yelled, at my husband to not give him that stuff (Adult foods, like yogurt, bacon, foods with spices, or anything that could make him sick from the spices or just being something other then his baby cereal and baby foods.) He can’t even clean a bottle after being asked. He just takes the top off and puts it in the sink. The only reason he made supper tonight was because I told him I was going to get pizza. Also he has a bunch of guys over on Saturday night, (Owen and I were out of town for the weekend) and we came home to a trashed house. Couldn’t I walk in the door and just have the house be as clean as I left it? With out dishes every where and blankets and pillows STILL on the floor?!?!?!? NO it was all there on Tuesday for me to clean up and deal with when I got home from a whole day of Flying and driving home from Texas. Its just getting crazy. Before we moved in to our new house he was a fanatic about keeping the house clean. He put his shoes away, didn’t leave laundry on the floor and cleaned up the kitchen.
He is getting so bad that he didn’t get or do anything for my first Mother’s Day. My feelings were so hurt and he didn’t even care. When he knew how big of a deal it was to me.
What do I do??? I am so frustrated nothing works! I am to the point where I just want to throw my hand up in the air and pack a bag take our son and go live with my parents (which I have not done since I was 19). I don’t know what to do! I know he loves us but loving us and helping us are two totally different things.
The best way, besides couple's counseling, is to sit down and calmly explain how you feel and how he makes you feel. If he knows you may leave because of his actions, it may make him "wake up." You are not a door mat.
If not those other two options...if they won't work, writing a letter would be the next third option. I hope it all gets better. A big hug to you, hun. :)
Best thing maybe is trying to sit down with him after you put down Owen for bed and explain to him how you feel and need some help around the house.
Thanks for ALL your support it really helped and means a lot. :)