I just need to rant for a minute...or two.

I'm not sure why I was thinking of this...
(It's long, I warn you now!)

I was remembering the first time I told my Dad about my husband (at the time, he was my boy friend). We had been together for 2 years at that point, and Dad had asked what I wanted to do during the summer now that the school year was over...I didn't wanna vacation or anything, I just wanted to hang out with my boy friend and my friends. He instantly swung onto "Boyfriend? You can't have a boyfriend." Of course, I got defensive. I was about to turn 18. Who was he to tell me I couldn't have a boyfriend? I told him I had been with Trevor for two years at that point, and that Mom and Mike (my step-dad) had absolutely no problems with Trevor, and in fact, they encouraged our relationship. Now Dad got mad. I fired back with "Well, we love each other, and our Moms say it's ok, so you can't do anything about it." I cringe now, remembering that...at the time, I was just mad. I was tired of -having- to see my Dad every Wednesday and every other weekend, and I would no longer have to on my 18th birthday, and he knew it. Now I realize how much it hurt him that I threw it in his face of how Mom's and Mike's approval mattered to me more than his, but like I said, back then...I was just mad and upset that he reacted that way. He told me that I didn't know what love was, and that he would talk to my Mom about forcing us to break up. I lost it. Who was HE to tell me what love was? He only married my mom because she was pregnant with me, he had cheated on my mom numerous times, he had done all sorts of things wrong, and I told him so. We were at a stop sign near my high school at this point, and my brother was in the back seat (he was 14 going on 15 and we were on the way to Dad's house an hour away...my brother was still a big fan of my Dad back then), so I said "I'm going to be 18 next month! You can't do ANYTHING anymore about what I do!" and I grabbed my backpack and my laptop and got out of the car and walked back to my Mom's house and told her I never wanted to see my Dad again and she couldn't make me go back, divorce agreement or not I was prepared to shout a judge down if they tried to make me...drama? Yeah, kinda, but this was the cherry on top of years of depression and being suicidal and several failed attempts at such, years of disagreeing with my Dad, years of not wanting to be dragged along to parties where everyone was drunk or high, years of being left at my 80 year old grandma with Alzheimer's for weeks at a time over the summer, years of being fed up with his constantly dirty house and beer and baseball games. I was so close to being done with it, and I wanted it to stop right THEN. I was -finally- happy, and it was because of Trevor, and my Dad had dared to try to take that away from me.

Again, I have no real idea why this was on my mind, but re-reading it now...I really needed to get all of that off of my chest. I think I've had some of that anger still inside for these years and I feel so much better getting it out...Sorries I did it here!

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    06/24/14
    Comment deleted
    About Morgan
    Current: Norfolk, Virginia
    Birth: July 17
    On Moms.com since: Apr 1, 2014
    I'm a SAHM and a Navy Wife. My little family is my life, and I enjoy reading and online gaming. I like to help out where I can, and I just want to live life happily.