Article: Growing up without grandparents

Since my mother has decided to make some bad decisions lately, she has written herself out of our family. That's sad to me, but sometimes decisions for our kids sake are the hard ones to make.

It brought to mind a few things. I grew up pretty much without grandparents. My fathers family lives in Italy. My mothers parents moved to California to be closer to us, but my grandmother was blind, deaf, in a wheelchair and spoke very little English, and my grandfather was of the mindset that girls are to be seen, not heard. So I had no relationship with any of my grandparents.

Now that I'm a parent, I want it to be different for Charlie. His dad's parents are amazing, I could not create better ones on paper if I had to. My father lives in California so he won't see him much. My mother.. well, see above.

I agree with some viewpoints of this article. Grandparents *can sometimes* be a great resource, but things have changed so much since they had babies that I rarely go to them for advice. But even without that advice I find it comforting and warming to have them as a strong presence in Charlie's life. The article makes a good point that we don't have the strong bonds we used to because often times our families are moving around so much for jobs that we just don't stick in one place like they did back in the day.

Do your kids have a bond with their grandparents? If they don't, do you fell that there is a void in their life because of it? How do you deal with that?

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    06/25/14
    amanda
    Wow. My parents and grand parents and my fiance's father and his grand parents have a good relationship with my kids. It is so great to see them get to spend time with them and they are so close. Unfortunately we have had to cut his mom out of the picture which I am sure you have all seen me rant about her on here before. But all in all they are better off.
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    06/25/14
    amanda
    I agree. His mom is a terrible role model for my kids and we just feel like they are much better off with out her. And life goes on. They are doing just fine without her around. It has been almost a year since she has seen them and she has never even seen our son. But it is the bed she has made for herself. It's a shame but I don't want people like her to have any influence in my children's lives. I may not be the perfect woman and I sure have made a lot of mistakes in my life but I am making a huge effort to change for the better for my kids and family so why would I let someone undo everything I am working so hard for.
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      06/25/14
      8Theresa Gould
      Our children love my mom but she is 1600 miles away. We only live an hour from my mil and our children have a decent relationship with her. So yes they have bonded with both grandmothers. They really didn't have a chance with their grandfathers.
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      About Alissa
      Current: Chinook, Montana
      Birth: September 17
      On Moms.com since: Jan 30, 2014
      *Site Hostess* I am a first time mom living in North Central Montana. I have a fiance, the most gorgeous baby boy, and a goofball dog named Lexi to fill up my plate :)