So dang confused

I am so dang confused right now. I am thinking about signing my rights over to my daughter's father (hubby) because I don't feel like I am doing a good job rasining her, wanting to do it any more I don't know, and I don't think I am in love with him any more. Don't get me wrong, I love him because he is my daughter's father, but I am not IN love with him anymore. I just don't know what to do.

When I started talking to him, I thought it was just going to be a small fling because I just got out of a nasty relationship with a guy that was hitting me and all that. So I was like what the hell lets have a small fling. Then not even 2 months after we hung out the first time, I come up pregnant.

I just don't know how to put how I am feeling right now. That is why I am reaching out to you ladies for some help. I don't have my mother around to help me. I am surprised if I talk to her once every 6 months. Not sure if anyone else has been through the feelings I am having right now or if it because my body is getting used to getting off my birth control shot, my cycle coming out of nowhere, or what. If you can ladies, please try to help as much as you can??

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    06/25/14
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          06/25/14
          8Theresa Gould
          That is such a huge decision to make. The others have given you sound advice. I hope you do speak with someone.
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            06/25/14
            All wonderful advice. Yes, I can relate in the sense that I had contemplated adoption for this baby as well as signing over rights as soon as she was born when Erik and I were having issues. We still have issues but we're determined to stick it out and to try to be a family. Every relationship has its own dynamics. Also sounds like you are overwhelmed. Couples counseling might also be something to look into if you want to work things out with your Baby's Dad.

            I can also relate to not having that bond with mom. She and I are so different in our ideals and life styles. My mom is not a good person to talk with as she's given me bad advice in the past.

            All the feelings you're feeling are real, and I validate them :-) Everyone is different, our chemical make up is different, our reactions are different, etc. You have a right to feel whatever you're feeling even though things appear confusing right now.

            I echo everyone's recommendations on here to seek counseling and to also see your medical doctor to rule out anything physical that could be causing these emotions, such as a thyroid problem. Whether it be depression or a thyroid issue, they're all treatable and best handled early on.

            I'm glad you reached out to us as we're all here to help one another. Good luck and keep us posted!
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            06/25/14
            Sorry you went through that and happy for you, that you guys are trying to work on things. I think that is what my main problem is that I am overwhelmed. I have taken on taking care of Ashley, all the house work, making the apt I need to make for her, insurances changing for the both of us, etc. So that might be a part of it.

            My mother and I had a drinking relationship. That is all it was. Once I got pregnant, and moved out, it was never the same with her.
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              06/25/14
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              06/26/14
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                06/26/14
                First sending you a hug. Second.... talk to him and let him know whats going on. A relationship is a two way street and YES like all streets there is always construction. You are doing the best you can for you daughter. She loves you. Make sure you really talk to him even if you have to stay up all night talk to him see where he is at and whats going on in his head.

                Yes your hormones could be a big factor in all of this. take a few months and get on a normal cycle. Maybe talk to you Dr about it. They might be able to help to if its a "mood" thing or if its something more serious. I just got help from my Dr and she perscribed me some new "happy pills" and I have only been on them for a month but they are helping and sometimes all we need is a little help.
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                06/26/14
                I will try an talk to him this weekend about it. Not sure how he will take it though.

                I am going to talk to my doctor in a couple of weeks. I have an apt July 12 to get checked out and I am going to bring this up to her. That is good that they are helping you. I might do that and see if she can prescribe me some "happy pills" and it might get me back into my normal self or close to it.
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                  06/26/14
                  I am planning on marrying a guy I have been with for a year and a half, but we have known each other about two and a half years. I am going to work as hard as I can for us to stay together but there is so much going on and a lot of times I feel like he is not what I want in a husband. I have decided to stick it out two years not married and if I am still with him and we have worked things out then will proceed. We have a 1 month old son and he also has a 5 year old daughter with whom the mother is just plain mean and doesn't ever put her daughter first, she makes my boyfriends life hell because they don't agree on how to raise her and his daughter is not disciplined by her mother. (which causes problems sometimes at our house) He has thought about the same thing but I think it would really hurt his daughter if he did that. I have seen good and bad come out of signing over rights but unless you think she would truly be better off I wouldn't. I am sure you are not doing things badly she may have a learning disability or something that is hindering her! I would try to talk it out with daddy and see if you guys can work with her more on things that she doesn't know yet :)
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                  About Nikki Novatin
                  Current: Dundee, Florida
                  Birth: February 06
                  On Moms.com since: Mar 24, 2014
                  My name is Nikki. Have 2 adorable daughter's named Ashley that is 3 and Theresa that is 3 months. Been a stay at home mom since I have had Ashley.