Your feedback please - Do you think what I did is justified?
So I've had a couple posts on here complaining about house sharing and one room mate in particular. This room mate knocks on our bedroom door this morning and asks Erik if he would drop off his rent money to our landlord if he's going out that way. Erik agrees to. Me in my head: WTH are you doing favors for him when he can't even clean up after himself???
As of half an hour ago, I see the envelope with his rent money on the coffee table and wrote on the outside of the envelope a letter that I believe is long over due.
I write something along the lines of: No, so-so, we are not going to drop off your rent money. We are not doing you any more favors. You won't even clean up after yourself. I'm stuck doing your dishes because I can't stand to look at them anymore. We even wrote you a kind letter asking that you'd wash your dishes and after a week they were still in the sink. You leave your hair balls on the side of the shower for others to clean up. ETC ETC
Then I shoved the envelope with money under his bedroom door. At this point, I'm so irritable coming back to find a mess in the kitchen again... I can't stand it anymore.
I told Erik and saids, "But I already told him I would. I'm not making any special trips out there since I'm headed that way anyway." Me: You've made me re-nig on some things I've told people I would do and you pointed out why. I remained a united front with you on those things.
So, would you have done what I did? What would you have done differently?
"I'm not doing so hot. It sucks to clean up after others even after a friendly note with a request asking that dishes get washed. And after a week of them still sitting on the counter and sink, I'm tired of looking at it. It's disgusting and unsanitary. So yeah, I'm pretty fuming pissed."
He did ask how I was doing, and I hesitated which he pointed out. That could've been my cue to let him know my concerns but was too chicken. I'm better on paper than confronting face to face. Sucks to be like that.
I was going to stick a note under his door. Erik found out and told me I would be causing more harm than good & no point since we're gone in a few weeks anyway. In some ways I feel like I'm being bullied like I have no voice because I'm scared that standing up for myself will raise hell in this household. Makes me question if I want to stay with someone like Erik because he pussy foots around others and doesn't understand how frustrated I am.
I realize Erik and I won't see eye to eye on things. Just makes things easier when you have that particular someone's support. Oh well...that's life.
I like the "Can I have a moment with you?" That makes for a great friendly transition.