have not been on in a while, looking for info

Ok, I have posted about my ex before, about how little he has had to do with our son, and my frustrations. Well Two weeks ago I received a message via facebook telling me that he was not bringing my son home from a summer visit, and now he is claiming that mikey has Autism which I know without any doubt is absolutely false. Mikey has never had any signs. he claims mikey retreats into a fantasy world, and from my experience with abuse, that is a sure sign something wrong is going on. it has come to my attention that Kenny, my ex may have been using me on his VA benefits as a dependent to gain more money, and that it is possible that he is now trying to gain custody of mikey to keep that dependent pay once I divorce him, he knew before the visit that I was filing for divorce. and if he can get a dr to sign off on something saying that mikey needs special medical needs, then he gets even more money. I am doing everything I can to find proof of this, but not sure where to look, as I have never had to go through any of this before. I know when he first got on benefits he lied to me claiming they would not allow him to put me as a dependent and that mikey and I could not receive benefits through him. So if it is true he has been falsely using me to gain money from the government , he has not supported me in over 4 years. and has never supported our son. does anyone know where I can call to find out if I am being used on his benefits. and what I need to do to stop this and get my son back home to us

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    08/10/14
    Ack, I'm really not sure. If you have his social, can you call the company/organization and see if you're a dependant? That's how it worked with Tricare in the USMC, but I've not messed with VA. What about DEERS... is there anything like that?

    I hope you get it figured out. I know this sort of thing happens all too often in the military. :( It'll cause problems, but you might be able to call his command for answers? If you're willing to deal with them. I know wives and military command doesn't mix, from personal experience.
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    08/10/14
    all that info he has kept from me, I guess he learned his lesson while still in the military, and I had his sgt on speed dial. he was forced to make an allotment to me to make sure he supported mikey. but once he got out, he said that he was not allowed to put me on his benefits, and now I am finding out that as usual he lied. My son does not have a mental disorder at all, he is a typical 5 almost 6 year old. hopefully soon I will know for sure. I go to court on the 20th to speak to a judge and hopefully convince her to let me go get my son. we already have money saved to go get him
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    08/10/14
    I've never heard of spouses being on VA benefits, I know I'm not on my husband's. I think to get a family plan you have to pay (a LOT) but that was to get Tricare after he was out, and I don't think there is a way for him to put me on his VA benefits, so he might not be doing that. I have no idea about children.

    No matter what's going on, I hope you get it figured out and get your son back.
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    08/10/14
    you can put your spouses and kids on your benefits, my uncle had his wife on it, and even now after they are divorced and he is remarried, because his ex wife was already on it and they had children together, she still gets medical. and having dependents on your benefits increases the amount of BAH you get every month. My boyfriend has his ex and kids on his as well, but its to support them, so that extra is supposed to go to the dependents, in my case my ex has been keeping the money, giving it to his girlfriend and using it to travel for magic of the gathering tournaments and romantic trips, right now they are in Boston, while my son is up in maine with his grandparents, who are disabled, so they can participate in comicon. they claim mikey has autism, yet have not told his family this, (I am close to his sister) and they leave to enjoy weekends alone and put my son with grandparents who do not have the means to care for an autistic child.
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    08/10/14
    Oh, so he's still in then? That makes a lot more sense, my hubby is out now. I was on his benefits when he was in.

    Playing the system for BAH is just messed up.... Has he told you why he thinks he has autism?
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    08/10/14
    no he is not in. benefits, depending on the situation I guess, can be used for the entire family, especially if there are any kids. and I think why you were let go of the army. My ex was let go because he was no longer mentally fit, and is 100% disabled, so he doesn't have to work or anything. my boyfriend is only 70% I think, and so he gets a small amount for BAH to go towards his kids.

    I am pretty sure the Autism is just a ploy to get more money. You get more if your child has special needs, and autism is the one of the more common of special needs children
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    About Raelee Klein
    Current: Orlando, Florida
    Birth: February 06
    On Moms.com since: Mar 17, 2014
    I am a stay at home mom, my kids are amazing, and too smart for me at times, love to sing and dance, and just hang out, and looking for people with kids the same age as mine so that i can introduce them to new friends!