Diplomatic solution with DH and In laws over visits?

My in laws know of our situation. My LO was born prematurely to keep his wgt up he had to continue overnight feeds up to 6 months old. My LO was on an apnea monitor, my DH seizures became uncontrolled and he could no longer drive or help me with the LO. DH seizures had gotten extremely sever and he has fallen and hurt himself frequently. Most of the responsibility of taken care of LO and running the house fell on me. So I am not working outside of being a full time mom, etc. I did not have regular help from others. I though I was going to have a nervous break down and it was a very stressful time. My DH and in laws pressured dizzy, exhausted me too tired to keep arguing into weekly visits. They do not visit us. I was driving once a week almost 2 hours a visit. We live out in the country now and everything is far away. I spend half my time in a car driving. Since my LO has improved I can finally not go 3 days without sleep on and off for 9 months, eat properly and attempt to take care of myself. I decided to stop visiting so much and insisted they come to visit for a change. Finally my DH supported me on this matter. However text messages sent to us both by his mom are rather paranoid in nature. I just ignored them. I think I married into a nice but crazy family. They demand more visits now since my LO is not longer on a apnea (breathing) monitor and health has improved. How do I just say no if ignoring does not work. I rather keep it diplomatic as long as possible so not to argue with my spouse or his family. I just am too drained. Other than that life is very good and we are blessed :)

    8Theresa Gould
    I think it is sad that they do not understand your plate is full and you are exhausted. I would tell them just that and if they want to see you and your children they need to come to you until you get rested up and feel it is safe to drive long distances again or something to that affect.
      I understand, and I agree with both of the ladies who posted before me. "No" is a full answer in itself. If they are being paranoid, let them know how you feel. They have no right to -demand- visits. If you are feeling up to it, then by all means, go visit them. But if you're not, if you just need time to yourself or you'd just like to be outside the car for once, tell them that they can come visit you. They need to understand that this is your life, your child, not theirs.
      About Kelley
      Birth: December 31
      On Moms.com since: Feb 5, 2014
      Married to my high school sweet heart. I am a Christian and a mommy. We had a miscarriage then a few months later was pregnant again. I love being a mom, dancing, scrap-booking and blogging.