When you HATE your friends kids...
I think I've written about this before.. it's gotten worse.. I have a good friend whose older child has been friends with mine since kinder (they're in 4th now).. he was sweet UNLIKE his younger brother, the same age as my younger (6 now) who was a total tyrant.. But tolerable since it was clear their was behavior issues and everyone else got along fine.. THEN she had another one and he's 2 now and a total clone of the middle one... He hits and screams and all the brothers hit each other and I've watched the older one, who was always sweet turn into a jerk before my eyes...
My friend, their mom.. does nothing.. Writes it off as "all boy" her boys are.. But I have a boy and I have other friends with boys and it's clear they're not all boy.. they're all jerks..
I have tried half a dozen times to ignore them and have playdates.. but it always is a total nightmare.. Hitting, fights and they all hit their mom if they get told "no". I can't watch.. not only that if they're here in my home, they are incredibly disrespectful and messy and last time the older one, once nice, made a point of pulling all of my sons lego ships apart... just to be a jerk. My son asked him to leave..
Here's the thing.. She's a good friend, but not GOOD... She has a way of comparing our kids and I've always taken the high road and ignored it and made sure I showed interest in her kids.. SO.. She's NOT the type for me to approach nicely and tell her.. She would be offended and then talk crap to others... She's that mom that "looks" like she's got it all together but her home is destroyed and it's just NOT fun being there.. or here... she doesn't SEE it..
I've managed to steer clear.. we keep busy, decline play dates, etc.. She called me one Saturday day asking for last minute baby sitting, if I could watch her kids here for a few hours while she went to a surprise engagement for a friends.. I lied and told her that my kids were sick.. But NO WAY.. a lll THREE of them? She said, that was okay and then made a joke in passing, "no one ever wants to watch MY kids".. and I had a chance but I failed... It's sad really.. Cause she's pretty fun and nice ..but we have to keep our distance.. I make sure that I keep in touch with her and when I see her we chat like nothing is wrong..
I don't know what to do.. There is no humility with her.. where she would actually come to me and say, "hey.. is something going on?" and then I would tell her nicely... So, I'm stuck..
I guess this is part of it.. kids are buddies and then swap throughout the years... ebb and flow right?