My oldest daughter has a different father and I got a hold of her real dad so I can get him to sign the adoption papers so my husband can officially adopt my daughter. He said that he would sign the papers, but now he is saying that he doesn't want to. That he wants to be apart of her life. He was into drugs hard core but him and his doctors say he has been sober for 2 years. 6 years ago he was investigated for child molestation, but was never convicted. The story into that was that he was covering for someone. He has made some really bad choices. I would like to know if I can force him to sign. He is a good man, who just makes poor decisions, but I want my husband to adopt her. I don't know what to do and really need advice on this.
Why are you so set on your husband adopting her? Are there specific reasons?
My oldest hasnt seen his father in 2 years. One reason is he has been in jail the last 6 months. Second he is technically homeless (crashing with friends). He is also a felon with an arrest warrant(not what hes in jail for...long story). He is also a mental and verbal abuser who doesnt mind getting drunk around my child and when is drunk gets very angry and physically abusive.
Even with all that I wouldnt ask him to sign over his rights for my husband to adopt because he is my sons father. If he does by chance clean up his act (very improbable) then I would slowly let him back in sons life.
For your daughters sake dont force him to sign over his rights. Allow them to have a relationship.
As far as the child molestation thing. Who did you hear the story about him covering from someone? If he wasnt convicted then Im guessing either he didnt do it or maybe there just wasnt enough evidence. Was someone else eventually charged? If so thats a big indication that he was innocent. If you still feel leary about that then just be vigilant and watch for signs from your daughter.
If you want your daughter to see him and have a relationship then why are you pushing for him to sign his rights away? That is very contradicting. How long ago did he say he would sign over his rights and then how long after that did he change his mind? In what way did you phrase the question of signing over rights? Maybe after he thought about it for awhile he realized that's not something he really wants.