lost baby

So i went ro my doc appt Wednesday august 31 and found out there was no heartbeat. So i went to the hospital and delivered my baby that night. Found out i was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia and hellp syndrome. I was discharged from the hospital on labor day. I have only been home for five days and each day gets harder realizing that my little boy wont be coming home. My due date was October 5th. We had him cremated because we wouldn't be able to go thru with having an actual funeral. So we are picking him up tonight. I was also told by my doctor that i should be back to my normal self by mid October and that my husband and i should wait another six months before we start trying again. Has anyone had this happen to them? How did you cope?

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    09/09/16
    So sorry to hear about your loss.....I personally have lost a baby but i wasnt as far a long as you were. I was still in the first trimester. For me at first i cried at random times any time something would remind me of a baby. It took a little while but i came to accept that my baby was never meant to be here on earth with me (dont know your religous beliefs) but i felt in my heart that god had something else planned for my baby that he needed that baby in heaven more than here. Just take it day by day some days will be easier than others but in time you can accept that this happened and when a baby does come to you healthy and smiley you will be a great mom and be grateful for them from having gone through this tragic experience. I will pray that you can find peace and when the time is right you and your hubby get a healthy baby.
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    09/10/16
    Thank you Michelle. It would have been easier for us if it was early on in the pregnancy versus a month before he was actually due. I cry a lot at random times. And it just hurts. I feel like the pain won't go away. My cousin is nice enough to buy me a necklace with his name on it for remembrance. And my husband is going to get his name and handprints/footprints tattooed on his chest. I am hoping that god needed my little boy for something versus us having him. Thank you I really appreciate it. Was that your first child that you lost? Do you have any other kids? This was our first unfortunately.
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    09/10/16
    yes it was my first, for my husband it was his second experience but it was the first time that he wanted the child. Since it was so early on i wasnt put on any restrictions as far as trying again. We now have two little girls, after losing the first baby i became pregnant about 2 months after. I wasnt planning on it but my husband was joking around saying that he was gonna put another one up there, and he did. Our oldest daughter just turned 6 on labor day this year. Our youngest daughter will be 3 on Feb. 5th. I understand completely the pain that you feel but I am sure that you will find peace, I will continue to pray for you and your husband. Feel free to message me if you ever need to talk.
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      09/11/16
      5Tabitha
      I'm sorry for your loss. I've lost one, but not that far along. Make sure you are talking to someone and talking to your husband. Don't be afraid to talk about depression and don't be afraid to go on antidepressants. Praying for you.
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        09/26/16
        I go today back to the hospital to get another CT scan done on my liver. And I am really hoping things are starting to look better. And then I go back to my obgyn on Thursday this week, to hopefully look at my stitches to see if they have dissolved yet. But I am hoping they can tell me when my husband and I can start trying again. We are going away for a nice little weekend in November and we are hoping that maybe by then they can tell me if we can start trying again then. I want nothing more than to actually be able to bring a baby home. And also hoping that it is another boy since we just had our baby shower a few days before I had to deliver my little boy, and everything we got was for a boy.
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        10/17/16
        Thank you. I just had my CT Scan today on my liver. So I will find out the results a week from today. So fingers crossed everything goes smoothly.
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          09/27/16
          4Nicole
          I'm so very sorry for your loss Amanda :'( It's never easy to lose a child..... Like Michelle I lost a baby as well (but very early). I can't even begin to imagine what you're feeling.......... My deepest condolences hun <3
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          10/17/16
          Thank you. I know it has been a little over a month since I delivered my stillborn but it's still hard on me. I hope we can start trying again very soon.
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          10/25/16
          4Nicole
          It never stops hurting unfortunately. .... I wish you all the luck hun!
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          About Amanda Bylski
          Current: Madison Heights, Michigan
          Birth: May 03
          On Moms.com since: Apr 7, 2015