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Me and my husband have gladly tooken in my sisters 14 year old son till she can take care of him in janurary. But he is a mess. He cusses and yells at us. I caught him doing something he shouldnt have been doung. How can i handle him? Any ideas moms?

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    12/27/13
    8Theresa Gould
    Did you, your husband and your sister go over ground rules for his stay or consequences if he does not behave for you? If not, now seems to be the time to do so.
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    12/27/13
    We went over ground rules but hes not listening!
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    12/27/13
    What kind of consequences are you thinkng about for him? A hour ago he broke 4 plates and kick the wall so hard it made a mark.
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    12/27/13
    8Theresa Gould
    Electronics, phone, ipod, computer, tv taken away? Grounded from going out with friends? Extra work? Dishes, garbage, shoveling snow, doing laundry.....
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      12/27/13
      I know but i can kinda of under stand. I mean even though i am his aunt and his mom is like 20 minutes away. It is hard for him to be away from his mom. But still he isnt doing whats told so..... I tried taking tv away he just got mad and i caught him watching tv at 1 in the moroing! His friends would just be mad if he couldnt go with them and they might tepee our house. I dont want him to do work because this isnt like hes my servant hes my nephew and its just so hard......
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      12/27/13
      Comment deleted
      12/27/13
      I want to punish him but not to harsh.
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        12/27/13
        8Theresa Gould
        Send him back to his mother then.
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        12/27/13
        His mom is unable to take care of him. She is really poor and i am really helping her out but.... still
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          12/27/13
          I talked to him and he didnt respond he just ran to his room. The one that i put a post on that is his room at my house. When i walked in later i nocited that he had cried and was quickly wiping the tears away. I set him in bed with a cup of tea and a book to read before he goes to bed at ten.
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            12/28/13
            Maybe try talking again... let him know you are there for him. Maybe he just needs some emotional support. it is hard to get uprooted from your family. No matter what happened at home he will still want to be there and miss his family. i know it can be hard even frustrating... but if he is really struggling emotionally maybe he just needs time alone. Make yourself a presence ... an open presence that he knows he can come and talk to... Remember that he is probably taking out his anger on you for the situation that he has not control over. unfortunately I am not sure if punishment will do the trick... a person who is angry will only get angrier and harbor resentment. I mean of course let him know that what he is doing is not acceptable and tell him that if he needs to cool down then please take some time and go to his room...but at 14 he needs to know you are there to support him not to make his life miserable (even though he his making yours challenging).
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            About Amanda White
            Current: Washington, District of Columbia
            Birth: November 22
            On Moms.com since: Dec 20, 2013
            I am married to my husband and im pregnant with my first one which is a boy! I love anmails and in my free time i read or do good serviecs. Also i love to read, bake, and i cant wait to meet all the great moms on this site.