Grandparents - help or hell?
Do your moms and dads help you with your kids?
Do you need theirs help?
My mom is pediatr, so I hope she will help me with my future baby - but I'm not sure about my hubbies parents... They are not very close to us and it's hard for me to communicate with his mom ...
Please share your expirience about your parents participation in your kids life.
My mil use to help out mainly after I gave birth but as she and our children got older it seemed she got bolder in voicing her displeasure with different things we did/do, so we had to start limiting the time we spent with her. She's a sweet lady (nearly 81) but when our children start asking why grandma said this or that.....not good. She also spoils the children far more than we want them to be or at least she use to before she retired.
My mom is in Canada and though we were fortunate enough to receive two visits from her this year, it's usually 1-4 years that we even get to see her....so the dynamics of distance makes us appreciate the little time we do get to spend with her. She lives differently than us, but has always respected our decisions. The children call her the "fun" grandma. She's also my mom so of course I am more comfortable with her. She has helped after a couple of my babies births, but mostly we just have fun when we are with her.
My mom doesn't really help or hurt. She's just kind of there. They see her sometimes but not terribly often. I wish they were closer to her but my mom has to take care of my brother as a priority and I can't let my kids be around my brother very much since he is an unmedicated mental illness patient who abuses drugs and alcohol.
So... grandparents aren't a big thing in my kids lives.