supervised visits...

tomorrow is my daughters first supervised visit with her bio father at our local family center. the visit is only an hour long but i wont be there with her. He hasnt seen our daughter since xmas (which didnt go well). How do i look past everything he has done to us? and is still doing?

03
    02/05/14
    8Theresa Gould
    As hard as it is, it's in your best interest to let the past go. For your health and well-being as well as Honesty's. Do it for her, if you can't do it for yourself. She needs a healthy, happy mama. If you do not have to be near your ex, then that's good. Tomorrow is a supervised visit so you know nothing can happen to her, right? Let go and breath. While she's gone do something special for yourself to help get your mind off the visit. Think of the positives, like being grateful it is only an hour. Hugs.
    4
    02/05/14
    you are very right, but my story is much longer than this. here it is: her father left me at ten weeks pregnant for another woman. sounds normal right? here's the catch: she was pregnant too by another man. my daughters bio father would rather be a dad to this womans child than to his own flesh and blood. even better: our babies were born 2 weeks apart! so i cant just let it go when all i wanted was a family for my child.
    1
    02/05/14
    8Theresa Gould
    Then unfortunately you are making a choice that is not going to change any thing for you or your daughter. Do you really think a man who cheats on you and leaves you is the best family for you and your daughter? I'm sorry but there are better men out there who will be faithful, loving, kind and love you and Honesty like you deserve.
    2
    02/05/14
    I agree with Theresa.. it's a very sad situation, but you need to put YOU and your daughter first.. what kind of a man would do that? Hopefully one you wouldn't want around anyways.. I think women get caught up in the picture perfect family life.. and sometimes its hard to let it go.. but for your benefit to move on and for your daughter to have a healthy life.. I think you need to try.
    1
      02/05/14
      Your person will come when it's time. They won't come until your happy in your own life though. Trust me on this. The best thing you can do is keep your eyes and focus on you and your daughter and heal from this and build yourself back up while being the best mom you can be to her.
      You can't control him or his choices or what he does. And u can't keep his daughter away from him because if them. That's just how the courts work now; if a father wants to spend time with their child then the courts grant them that chance. Let your little one have whatever kind of relationship she can with him, she will grow up and ask questions and one day will be able to see what you've done for her. Trust me. Been there.
      He took what u wanted away from you. That's awful but then look at it as a blessing as he doesn't seem the type to NOT do it again.
      But don't make it about him. Make it about you and your daughter. Give her the strength and confidence to build a relationship with him.
      Your time will come. Your person will come. But right now you gotta get yourself back so you can be someone good to be in a relationship with. Don't look for someone to fill that emptiness. Fill it on your own first.
      I'm willing to bet that he's not all that happy. He doesn't have his daughter and he lives with another mans child and thAts not easy either.
      Stay focused in you and your little one and everything will get better. I promise. I know this. I've been there and understand more than you know.
      1
      About Hazel
      Born: Morrisville, Vermont
      Current: Cabot, Vermont
      Birth: December 30
      On Moms.com since: Feb 2, 2014
      I'm a single mom taking care of my daughter Honesty. I love spending time with her. Just wish things were different and that I could give her the family she so deserves!